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Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S4
I think something should be developed if it is of interest to at least 75% of the congregation members.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S7
I have been intrigued by this proposal since I first heard about it and am very much in favor of such a garden for my own interment.
Thanks for all the good work and the survey.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S9
This is not an issue about which I feel strongly, although I know others do. It seems like a worthwhile project if it can be accomplished
without having a dramatically adverse affect on other Eliot programs.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S10
I have always envisioned the Memorial Garden as just that - a "garden" where one can meditate or just have some solitary reflection time.
Nothing elaborate or multileveled - pricewise or in any other way. Certainly not a mausoleum or cemetery! I plan to memorialize both of
my deceased parents here if price permits and it's a comforting spot. Look forward to hearing what others have in mind.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S16
I like the current landscape. Maybe trim it up a bit, add a few more or new shrubs or bushes...maybe even wild flowers. I feel the
church has other financial obligations to fulfill before indulging in an extravagence. The building needs repairs, bills should be paid off,
etc. In addition, donations for this project will dilute the contributions towards other needs/organizations in the church, such as the youth
group, building fund, Bergfried projects, community projects and donations.
I believe that memorials belong in the hearts of individuals, not on the walls, fences or doors. Monies contributed could be better utilized
for the betterment of future generations and for the living.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S23
It will be great to have a quiet meditative place. I personally don't like the idea of using it for ashes. My preference would be to have a
memorial garden at the church with plaques or stone markers, and the option of spreading ashes at Bergfried.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S24
Grandmother and grandfather are in memorial garden in Scarborough, England. There is a memory book and ashes can be placed near
other deceased person if requested. Otherwise, placed clockwise in next quadrant. Could buy plaque space for minimal amount on
concrete edging for walkway or plaque on some planting - plaque space good for 10 years, then contact to renew plaque - pay fee or
give up space. Did think memorial book is important feature of space.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S25
I oppose having a specific area that connects personalized, inorganic monuments (vs plantings) with interment of ashes, especially
adjacent to the sanctuary.
I am very concerned that getting a dedicated interment space including personalized monuments will constitute a cemetery in the eyes of
others if not our own. This is likely to seriously affect our ability to sell the current Chapel buildings. In addition, it runs against my
personal sense of what Eliot is vis a vis "organized" religion. Frankly, it feels too Catholic if the placement is immediately adjacent to the
church. I also think that would compromise the meditation possibilities. Eligibility for memorialization should be restricted to Members and
Friends and their immediate families, including same sex couples. Seating preference is for benches.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S31
Q04 - Simple records book or computerized database in addition to paving stones.
Q07 - No specific grid location, but buried or mixed with soil rather than spread on surface.
Q13 - Yes - memorials/memorial area. No - cemetery/containers
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S32
Q04 - Simple records book or computerized database in addition to paving stones.
Q07 - No specific grid location, but buried or mixed with soil rather than spread on surface.
Q13 - Yes - memorials/memorial area. No - cemetery/containers
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S33
Q7 - Lawn area by parking lot could be problematic because this area is necessary for some games and outside activities.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S34
Q7 - Lawn area by parking lot could be problematic because this area is necessary for some games and outside activities.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S37
I think having a "cemetery" on Eliot grounds is not particularly useful. I would personally like to see a simple garden that would evolve
from donation in the memory of people. That is, a bench here a tree there some stepping stones etc. and in time a very nice
contemplative area would develop. Once the first area was done another could be begun. People should be free to spread ashes, bury
them etc. as they wish however there should be no guarantee of them being recovered.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S46
Very glad you are doing this and have been persistent so long.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S54
Another way to do name/date marking would be a single slab on wall with many names.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S56
Memorial not dependent on having ashes to inter. A person could be buried at a traditional cemetery and still have a memorial at Eliot.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S57
Q2 Although I would prefer unlimited access to a garden, I would not want it vandalized. If that meant only during Eliot hours, I would go
along with it.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S62
Q04 - Quality of inscription is important - should be into granite or stainless steel, not a paver or brick or limestone.
Q13 - Consider the possibility of wanting to add on to the sanctuary or Adams hall - the only viable direction is the northeast corner of the
property. I think there are other areas of the property that may work better for a memorial garden.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S66
Q03 - NE corner first choice if landscaped for privacy from sanctuary glass window viewing by plantings.
Q06 - Pets should not be included.
Q13 - I feel a record should be kept of all memorial gifts to Eliot; all interments; and all child dedications, marriages, and memorial
services/funerals which take place at Eliot (i.e., rites of passage) and maybe dates of death for all who were pledging Eliot members and
friends at some point during the two years prior to their death -- or had discussed inability to pledge with a minister. Some flexibility
should probably be included in the direction of Inclusion rather than Exclusion.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S67
Having a garden with the cremated remains of members/friends seems like a cemetery. I think it would bother a lot of people. If it was
with the names only, that would be preferable. (In favor if no ashes; otherwise opposed)
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S73
Is this a species-specific garden? Have we discussed memorials (or interment) of non-humans? Do we need to?
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S74
Is this a species-specific garden? Have we discussed memorials (or interment) of non-humans? Do we need to?
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S75
I think it would be wonderful to have a place to contemplate the loss of our loved ones. Death is the most profound experience of life,
and we will all experience it. I think it is good to have a tangible reminder of the death and loss of those we loved. I think the garden is
one way to do that. An area with live plants reminds us that life goes on. Would it be possible to "memorialize" someone not physically
interred here? Call me if you would like me to elaborate on this.
Affiliation: Friend, Survey #: S76
I think it would be wonderful to have a place to contemplate the loss of our loved ones. Death is the most profound experience of life,
and we will all experience it. I think it is good to have a tangible reminder of the death and loss of those we loved. I think the garden is
one way to do that. An area with live plants reminds us that life goes on. Would it be possible to "memorialize" someone not physically
interred here? Call me if you would like me to elaborate on this.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S77
Loraine and I have for many years hoped that a memorial garden would become a reality. We are now very aged, Loraine at Delmar
Gardens Creve Coeur and I soon moving to Friendship Village in Chesterfield. Because of all the changes lately, it has not been possible
to attend any of the meetings. But this does NOT mean we are not vitally interested. We hope you get started and we will do what we
can financially afford under the circumstances. This is something the church definitely needs as a service and a tribute to the old
members and their families. Rudi/Loraine Heider
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S81
Q03 - NE corner first, interior courtyard second. There must be a better idea than the area by the parking lot, or Bergfried.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S83
Q08 - Markers moved up to 20 years from memorial installment.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S84
I'd rather have the money spent on landscaping. For those who need some physical reminder of those who have died, cemeteries are
readily available. We have a brick engraved for Ruth, my civil, interesting, smart, honest, uncomplicated mother-in-law. But by far the
most important memory of Ruth is in my mind.
I believe memorial services are really important. Daniel and Bonnie, like John and Janet, do this well. I would find the presence of
"repeat" (habitual) mourners on Eliot property distasteful and unseemly. If a memorial whatever is built, please locate it behind a privacy
screen so that I do not have to look at it. If I do not get my way, I will try not to pout (but no promises).
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S85
My interpretation of a memorial garden is landscaping for the entire church property to which people can contribute funds to memorialize
family or friends. There should be a professional landscape plan. I have come to the conclusion that our property is too public a space
for a cemetery-like atmosphere. I do feel it is important that a memorial book be maintained listing the deaths of members/friends and
memorial services held. A second book should list names of those memorialized by gifts to the landscaping or by gifts to other projects.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S86
I am adamantly opposed to such a memorial area on church grounds. The concept of a garden involving some kind of statuary, internment
of ashes, etc., is appropriate for cemeteries and mausoleums, not for a community of the living. Further, if we provide places for
internment, would we then need to provide places for burials? To provide one and not the other seems unfair. Given this issue, a
memorial garden would not even represent the diversity of Eliot.
Then there is the issue of a cemetery/mausoleum atmosphere at Eliot. This is completely unacceptable. Bury or intern elsewhere, Eliot is
for the living.
Q03 - First choice: A pavestone path replacing the front sidewalk and winding around the tree to the right of the main entrance at the front
of the church or a plaque near the tree.
Q13 - Pave stones with names and dates of those memorialized can replace existing sidewalks around the church when the front walk
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S87
Some of the money raised for parking lot and chairs was announced almost after the fact was for a memorial garden. Isn't this rather
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S88
Why add another "thing" to take care of?
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S89
One of Jim's requests was for his ashes to be in a memorial garden at Eliot. I would like to honor this wish as would his children and
other family members. Mickey Buchanan
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S90
I strongly support prompt action on this project.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S93
Q11 - I would like a memorial plaque.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S99
A garden (whatever that may mean), a serene place for individuals to contemplate.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S101
Q01 - I have my husband's ashes in my linen closet.
Q02 - I want to be mixed with the soil.
Q09 - I would like to donate something, but finances at the moment do not allow this.
Q13 - I don't think a person should be required to make a donation.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S102
Q08 - Move markers or reproduce
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S103
Q03 - Bergfried in addition to an on-site garden
Q04 - Paving stone walkway has advantage of being portable if congregation moved, but could ashes be moved?
Q07 - Have question of whether ashes could go with congregation to new building if we moved. I would favor whichever choice would
allow this.
Q09 - Not likely to contribute at this time, but definitely plan to have ashes interred here.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S105
Q03 - Bergfied location OK but not in immediate picnic/camping area.
Q13 - Good idea of wider use of memorial book … that is, births, deaths, marrriages, etc.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S106
Q04 - Marry the aesthetic with the ease/cost of installation
Q08 - Move name markers only if easy
Q13 - I would love a little water moving, though that adds $$$. I also envision a very 'solid' perimeter on the north and east
edges,whether planting, fence, or wall. Since this would be near Argonne, are we sure we can encroach that close to street w/height?
I want to feel "enclosed" while sitting in area - and embraced.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S107
Q08 - Move both ashes and markers unless it's excessively expensive.
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S108
Q04 - Will the bricks last a long time?
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S114
Q10 - Under $100
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S115
Q10 - Under $100
Affiliation: Unknown, Survey #: S126
Q02 - Small fountain desirable
Q03 - Lawn area second choice (but not all of Eliot meadow)
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S128
Q02 - I prefer informal, naturalized landscaping - inviting to birds and butterflies, with a water feature.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S130
I am inclined to want my ashes interred at Bergfried. I would envision an area set aside at Bergfried with a stone bench or the like. The
previous owners of Bergfried (the Lingenfelders) have a family plot on the ridge; that is the type of "set up" I would imagine. That would
also allow people to have a traditional marker, or even be buried without being cremated, if that was their desire (an option that is clearly
not practical at the Chapel). Again, I refer to the precedent set by the Lingenfelders. I would probably be willing to increase my monetary
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S131
There would be no cost other than the cost of a plaque with name engraved on it which would be added to the list. This would be paid
for by family. If desired, a hosta could be planted by family, and a large hosta garden would be beautiful in the interior courtyard. Keep it
simple. No bricks, no stones, no boxes, no benches, no walls, just ashes buried.
Affiliation: Friend, Survey #: S132
I think it should be kept very simple to go with a natural setting. If someone wants to be memorialized in stones, plaques, etc., they should
choose the conventional cemetery setting.
Affiliation: Member, Survey #: S135
$30,000 seems to be too much for landscaping.
Note: You will note that the survey results say there were 129 respondents yet there are comments from respondent numbers higher than 129. This is because of the way the database works when a record is deleted and re-entered. We can actually trace comments back to their source as long as the person identified themselves on the survey form.