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A Note from Reverend Bonnie

Parents as God

How do we, as parents, affect our children's spirituality? We often think about things such as telling them stories from different religious traditions, small rituals of bedtime prayer or giving thanks at meals, and of course, bringing them to church. We try to teach them a sense of morality, emphasize characteristics such as honesty and responsibility, and eventually hope to engage them in ethical analysis of the word around them.

But I think there's something more basic than all this. I believe that a child's experience of being loved and accepted from the earliest ages is directly related to that child's experience of the goodness of being alive. Those of us who wish to talk about God with our children usually talk about a God who loves and protects them, or a God who is present when we care for and nurture one another, or a God who is inside everything and causes all the world to grow and change and be dependent on everything else, in a huge, complex web. But of course, for small children, we are all those things.

Children learn by running into boundaries. Most of the time they seem to fling themselves at these boundaries, over and over again. Surely this time the limits can be broken? Surely this time their little immortal soul can soar into the universe doing exactly as it pleases? Yet children who experience no boundaries quickly find life unmanageable, frightening, and essentially without that underlying sense of love and protection that is part of most religions' concept of God. Children need boundaries. And yet, they need to feel accepted and lovable even when they test the boundaries. Parents can lay a foundation for a child's belief that s/he is loveable by accepting a misbehaving child even while holding to the limits of acceptable behavior. Tricky line to walk.

And then there are the occurrences in your child's life that suddenly prove to them that you are not God after all. Death or severe illness, accident or abuse, especially affecting someone in the immediate family, may shake whatever strong foundation has been laid. Even then, we have learned what a powerful process grief can be. Children can grieve their way back to a sense of wholeness, just as adults can. Again it's usually just a matter of healthy limits mixed with a consistent sense of love and acceptance that lead to healing.

Children with this basic sense of self-worth and personal limits seem willing and able to feel a connection with a loving God, or a full sense of the meaning and power of being alive. If you were raised with this self-confidence, you have a good chance of being able to give it to your children. If not, there is no failure in seeking support while you learn new skills. None of us succeed in always being loving or always holding the limits. Yet loving limits are foundational to a child's life-long sense of the wonder of being alive. No, parents are not God. But we reflect God possibilities for our children. I hope Eliot can support each of you in this sacred endeavor.

(Reprinted from September 2005)

Faithfully,
Rev. Bonnie

September RE Calendar

New, Improved Family Potluck

NEW DAY & TIME: To make the Family Potlucks more family friendly than in the past, we're offering this fall's potluck on Saturday, September 23 at 5:00 pm. We'll eat together and then visit together. The Family Support and Outreach Committee members will provide dessert and drinks. All of the RE Committees (Children's Chapel, Curriculum, Family Support & Outreach, Special Events, and Teacher Support) will be represented with a member or two and we'll have a table set up so that you can learn more about what they do and ways to help out. The Curriculum Committee will have materials about this semester's curricula and we'll also have packets about the RE program available for our new families. We expect it to be a fun event for newcomers and veterans alike! Because drinks and desserts will be provided, here is what to bring if your family name begins with:

• A - L bring main dishes
• M - Z bring salads/side dishes

Spotlight On: The Curriculum Committee

The Curriculum Committee plans, coordinates and supports the implementation of the educational programs used to teach grades K - 5 and oversees all curriculum through 6th grade. We review available curricula and select plans and lessons that fit the Religious Education program's learning goals for our children. Our program is currently divided into 4 pillars: UU Identity, Jewish and Christian Heritage, World Religions and Social Justice. We also select and help to implement the summer RE program. We meet several times each year, depending on what we need to do! Members of the 2006-2007 Curriculum Committee are: Committee chair Hilary Babcock, Susie Bradley, Dave Day, Katy Miller, Rich Wagner, and Nancy Williger.

Secret Pals

Back by popular demand! If you have a child or children in grades K - 5 who would like to take part in the Secret Pals program this year, participation forms will be passed out in church on September 10 and September 17. They will also be available online during that period. The Eliot Chapel Secret Pal Program is a month-long exchange of cards and small gifts between children and adults ($10 maximum spent during the month). Our goal is to build friendships between generations.

These forms must be returned NO LATER than Friday, September 22; otherwise you are responsible for finding your own child's pal if you want your child to participate. If this year is typical, we'll have no problem finding the kids who want to be Secret Pals - but we want to remind everyone we really need adult volunteers to be either a pal or help with the party! For this reason, we ask that if a child participates in the program, at least one parent help out.

On Sunday, September 24, adult pals will choose their Secret Pals in Adams Hall. Just look for our table if you would like to be a pal.

All participants must be able to attend our Secret Pal party on Friday, October 27, from 6:30 - 8:30 pm. We hope many of you will participate, children and adults alike.

Summer RE Thanks

Thanks to the members of the 2005-2006 Curriculum Committee for leading the multiage class during summer RE (Hilary Babcock, Susie Bradley, Dave Day, Ben Gleason, Rich Wagner and Nancy Williger) and to all the parents who supported the program by volunteering to assist.

"Act Today with Love and Kindness"

Smile at a stranger whenever you can
You never know what good that smile might begin.

Chorus
    Act today with love and kindness
    When we do they come back and find us.

Speak with compassion/Speak with calm
Whenever you're mad/And that anger'll be gone.

Chorus

If someone's hurt and there's something you can do
Treat them as you would have them treat you.

Chorus

Those were the words to one of the songs our campers learned during our Buddhist themed Summer Camp in August. (Our music director Nancy Collis kindly supplied the words and music.)

We had 46 campers and 27 volunteers - our largest camp yet! We had a wonderful time and we want to thank everyone who made it possible: Crafts - Anne Meneely, Wendy Cutshaw, Erin Jung and Christie Lee.. Discovery - Jeanne Kloeckner, Juliette Crone-Willis & Tracey Howe-Koch. Drama - Lisa Beck, Margo McIlroy & Julie Leemann. Games - Amy Kruger & Dianne Wagner. Music - Nancy Collis. Snacks - Stacy Bereza-Bowen & Terry Smith Keller. Childcare - Alex Hunstein. Other helpers - Susan Pritchett, Elizabeth Allen. We also had several youth helpers assist.

If you missed camp this summer, mark your calendar for August 6 - 10 next year when we explore Stories the Hebrew Prophets Told!

Circle Suppers for Families

Do you want to better get to know other UU Families? Family Circle Suppers are an organized way to have dinner with a small group of other families from Eliot Chapel. Several times a year your group will have dinner together one time in each person's home. The host family provides the main course, the beverages, and will welcome the other families' children. The other families will bring a side dish or dessert and their children.

We'd love to have you join the fun. Just pick up a flier, fill it out and return it to Joan Casey. Family Circle Suppers are sponsored by the Family Support and Outreach Committee.

UU Parenting group

Join our UU Parenting group on Yahoo anytime. Just go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/uuparenting to get started.

Music News

Time for Children's Chalice Choir!

The Chalice Choir will be practicing between services again this year. Anyone who really likes to sing and is in first grade or older can join. We will start on Sunday Sept. 17th. Come to the music room (next to the nursery) at 10:30 am. (A parent or guardian must check in with each singer the first day). The volunteer leaders will be Jan Chamberlin and Nancy Collis.

Parents are welcome to help. If you want to sing or have any questions, please contact Jan before the 17th at (314) 662-2947 or .

New Songbook for UU Children!

It's called "May This Light Shine" and was just published by the UU Musician's Network. (The pictures are drawn by UU kids and a couple are by our own Frances F.!) This book is full of brand new songs written especially for us. The Chalice Choir will be singing from it and helping teach the songs. So keep your ears open!

Playgroup Fun

We hope some of our families with tots can make our first fall playgroup session on Friday, September 8 in the nursery at 10:00. Our schedule this church year is: September 10, October 13, November 10, March 9, April 13, May 11 and June 8. Please contact Wendy Cutshaw (636-326-2491) of the Family Support and Outreach Committee for more information.

Have a Milestone in your life to share? Have a Milestone in your life to share? Know of an Eliot student living his or her faith? Please contact Joan Casey so that we can share your family's news in REjuvenation!, our children's RE newsletter, and on our RE bulletin board on the wall leading into Adams Hall. For More News... To learn more about who had August and September birthdays, be sure to pick up a copy of REjuvenation! today. Religious Education Department Rev. Bonnie Vegiard, Programs Minister Joan Casey, Religious Education Director Mishael Eastabrook, Youth Director This newsletter is a product of the Eliot Chapel Religious Education Department. Please direct any articles, comments, or questions to Joan Casey (Religious Education Director) at 314-821-0911 or at . An article must be submitted no later than the 20th of each month to ensure it appearing in the next issue. Back To Top